Monday, October 08, 2012

Discrete delusions

Monday returns and I am reluctant to move and get myself off bed to work, though I know I feel rather ridiculously unproductive since i was unfocused since the past couple of days.

The past weekend was eventful, sport, orchestra, party and friends gathering. Weirdly, I found myself lost in an unknown track. I felt empty.
The beautiful orchestra pieces were played, the violinists drown themselves in the rhythm and yet I was rather feel uneasy knowing I was missing out something else while I'm listening to this.

Something I thought I would never need it since I stepped out and fight with the world, and today I found myself eager in a delusional feeling and longing for it.

The pictures came clearer of what I want and what I need. I listen to myself and gasp why didn't I realize this a little bit earlier. I'm lost in words.

With doubt, I need to be stronger if I decided that this is what I want. Discipline and rules to be complied.

This has to be done soon enough.

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