Yesterday, I sat down and had dinner with another four grown up. I called them grown up, at least that is how I felt about them. Being the youngest and single among all, I tended to keep quiet and listen more than usual. I though felt pressured for certain period while listening to the old timer story. Whilst my heart was like a horse racing and it beat faster at the moment of hearing the truth and the sweet lies.
While they were sharing their stories, I acknowledged myself that I should just listening and not to put myself in their shoes for the moment. Realizing life is very simple and yet can be so tricky and complicated. There are responsibility, love, commitment, care, family and etc. that you need to take into consideration. I was listening to a man that I have never been once giving my respect, I know I'm mean but at least I'm being honest, made me feel sorry for myself for being such a paranoid and hatred person. His story, his way to live his life, was so different from what I thought it would be. He might not be a perfect father nor husband but at least he had done or is doing what he think he should or have to do. And I respect that.
I will not going to details of what we were discussed about. But I would highlight this, whatever you thought it would be a bad happening or you don't like the way it appeared. It doesn't mean it will be the worst of all because you'll never know every side of the story at once.
I also finished reading another book titled, For One More Day. The story is about the love of the mother and son and how the son had never forgiven himself and felt ashamed of his life for committed a lie, the only lie. However, it tells me a different side of the story in comparison from what I have been through yesterday and another 9 thousands of yesterday.
I believe that, no man would deserve the hatred if he did what should be done. The lively spirit keeping its best to survive and fight for the righteousness in each day. It is the spirit to believe in when a man is truly living his life by growing through it and not feeling ashamed of being one.
And there are moments in life that you would feel ashamed or not feeling right of what you have done and what you should be doing. No matter what you're doing, just do it at your best. If it didn't turn out very well as you expected it. It's ok. Remember, it's ok.
No man have never make mistake if he have never done anything, we all do. Accept and Forgive is the key to begin a new step and love will always keep you in peaceful stage and wonderful mind.
There are thoughts in my mind that I could not take them out and put into words. I could only write this nonsense and hoping someone could ever feel and the way I feel.